The Waiting Game

It's been almost 2 months since we've gone active with our agency.  So far, nothing has changed.  We are still going about our daily lives and planning for the future.  On the 26th of this month we're going to London for about 5 days.  I am very excited about this trip.  We hope to meet up with some friends that live over in England for at least a day and that should prove to be very entertaining. Other trips we have sort of planned is a long weekend snowboard trip for the Hubs.  Basically, that means he'll get to be on the mountain all day for a few days whilst I get to relax in a nice hotel room and possibly avail myself of the local shopping establishments.  :-) Nothing has been set in stone with that one but I'm really looking forward to it because when we go on our trips we never just get to relax and have a down day. My parents are coming out in April and that's something I'm really looking forward to. We have some ideas in mind about taking a trip down the coast starting in Amsterdam and I think it sounds like loads of fun.

So, for right now we're just going about our daily lives.  Some days I do wish the phone would ring but I know that it's going to take some time.  I've learned to be quite patient during this whole process so now I just have to keep up the good work.  There really is no news other than that but I did want to check in and let people know that we're still alive and that things are going well.  I hope you all have a Happy Holiday season!!

We Are Active!

I'm very excited to announce we are now officially active with our adoption agency.  It has taken us 5 months and many sheets of paper, lots of time, and even more sleepless nights to get us here but we finally made it over one giant hurdle.  I wanted to say thank you to everyone for your support and kind words, they have meant so much to us!

If you want to look at our profile, you can click here and it will take you directly to our page.  I do want to ask if you know someone who is thinking about adoption as an option for them, direct them to our agency. You don't have to mention us, but I know that our agency will make anyone wanting to create an adoption plan welcome and supported and will do everything they can to make the process as easy as possible.  They have been extremely helpful and profession and I'm glad we've chosen them for this experience.

Almost there!

Last Friday we sent off our notarized Activation Agreement and the activation fee to the agency!! Huge, huge step in the process.  This means that, once the agency receives everything, we will be active within 24 hours and our profile will be shown to perspective birth parents.  We are done with paperwork, emails, and everything else for a while.  Now comes the waiting part, which I am horrible at.  But the holidays are coming up so that means I will be busy cooking, baking and planning Christmas.  I'm guessing that should keep me occupied for a few months.  I told myself I wouldn't start getting antsy or concerned until at least June and I want to make that a true statement! My parents are coming over for my birthday next year and then my best friend will be over in May so I'll have a lot to look forward to and many plans to make.

Thank you for all the support and kind words that have come our way.   It means so much knowing that we have an awesome support group with all of our friends and family.  We are so incredibly excited for whatever the future holds! 

Quick Update

Ok party peoples, here's the current low down on our adoption progress. As of now all we are waiting on is a media specialist at the adoption agency to finish putting together our family profile. That's it.  Our home study is complete and has been reviewed by the agency.  The video profile has been done and turned in to be created.  All of the paperwork, questionnaire's and mindless other annoying but necessary tasks have been completed.  Within the next few weeks we should be Active with our agency!

I've had a lot of questions about this, mostly from people I work with, but I'll explain the whole process of being active here so that people get an idea of what we're talking about.  When we signed on with our agency we had to fill out a questionnaire about our basic family life (religion, school background, jobs, etc) along with answering questions about what type of race we are willing to adopt, substance use by the mother and her medical history.  Now, when a woman is considering adoption and she makes an adoption plan with our agency she fills out a similar questionnaire.  She'll select things like, "Wants a Christian family" or she only wants to be shown families who currently don't have children or things of that nature. Basically, we both put down what we're looking for and based on our answers, if they are compatible, the adoption agency will show our profile to the perspective birth mother.  If she likes us, we'll schedule a meeting.  Or if she flat out chooses us, then we'll get notified by the agency and will be given all of the pertinent info and are asked if we accept.  It's very much like a match making service bringing two people together.  I think it's a very wonderful way of ensuring both sides are happy with the decision and it gives us both a chance to hopefully be as informed about each other as possible.

With all that being said, we are only weeks away from our profile being shown to perspective parents.  We could be getting a phone call soon after we are active, or it may come several months down the line.  But the point is that we are infinitely more closer to achieving our  goal of becoming parents.  I have started to make a list of what I want to have ready to go when we do get the call. I want to have a bag all packed for the baby that includes at least clothes that have been washed, diapers wipes and bottles.  This weekend I want to go look at baby furniture to get that all set and ready to go.

Other than that, we're just trucking along.  I'll post again when we're active and with any other updates. :)

Love,
Sammee

Family Profile

So as a quick update we are very close to getting our family profile completed.  All we have to do is the video profile portion this week before we send back the video camera and then as long as the media specialists don't need anything else, we're done submitting stuff.  Once the profile is put together and approved by us then we'll be able to active our profile and we'll be shown to potential birth families. I can't believe it's finally coming together.  It seems so surreal that I'm actual close to acheiving my goal.  When I was visiting my in-laws this weekend we went to the Cracker Barrel for breakfast and I found a little boys sock monkey outfit that was so adorable I just had to buy it.  The cool thing is that it can be used for either boy or girl so it will work no matter what we get :). My mother-in-law said she can't wait to have a grand baby to spoil so I'm glad we're finally able to tell, it won't be much longer until we're just waiting on a phone call.  My best friend thinks we'll be matched by Christmas but that's too ambitious for me to hope that it will work out that way. 

Other than that, there's no other major news to report. We're visiting my family this month so I'll be using this time to soak in the time with my nephew and my mom and dad and enjoy filming all the glorious stuff that I miss so much. 

An Update

Hello everyone, sorry it's been so long since I updated.  Here's where we're at:

I am submitting the photos for our family profile this week.  Finally!!  I have been procrastinating at this for a long time and now I'm just going to get it done.  Hopefully I chose pictures that put David and me in a good light and will entice someone to seriously consider our family.

We are also about to get our video profile equipment as well.  Once that comes in the mail we'll be able to take the footage for a video that will go on our family's profile online as well as YouTube.  They post it on YouTube so that any woman who is considering adoption but doesn't want to make the commitment to an agency can browse through videos and see if she finds a family she likes.  We're going to make it as spectacular as we can!

Additionally I had to rush and gather a whole bunch of paperwork this evening to send to our adoption agency. That was fun awful.  For some reason I assumed our home study agency would be sending the information for us but apparently that wasn't the case.  Oh well, I got all the documents so it's done and over with.

Other than that everything is good and on track.  Hopefully we'll be all settled and ready to go by next month.  If not, by October.  And then it's just waiting on phone call! :) Wahoo!!

I'll keep you posted as much as possible.

Selfish

I was laying in bed last night reading my book on adoption and the section I was reading was on building healthy adoptive families.  The chapter, and really the whole book for that matter, has been talking about making the child aware from a very early age that they are adopted and to make it an open conversation in the household.  To me, that's fine.  I don't want to keep secrets from the child because that will only hurt our relationship when the truth comes out.  However, all of these things I'm reading keep making it seem as if I should be pushing the subject and making the child's entire identity.  I'm not sure if that's what they intend or if I'm interpreting it wrong but that's how it seems to me.  I want my child to know they were adopted, of course, because it is part of who they are, but I don't want to make it ALL of who they are.  I don't want it to detract from me being their mother and making sure they know they are loved and that Dave and I are their family forever.

I also realized I don't like sharing certain things, and one of them will be my child.  One of the things required by our adoption process is that we have to send at least pictures and letters to the birth mother 1-2 times per year and possibly extending that to include emails, phone calls and visits.  The pictures and letters I'm fine with because I can certainly understand wanting to know your child is happy and loved.  We haven't chosen to do a fully open adoption because we don't want possible unexpected visits.  I guess, to be blunt, we just want to a chance to be parents without having to share.  Maybe I'll feel differently once the adoption occurs and we're actually in the middle of everything, but for now I am just feeling like I want to act like a little kid and say "No!".  People who adopt are forced to make so many concessions to be parents and sometimes it seems so flipping unfair to me.  I'm sincerely hoping that I'll feel differently when it's all said and done, but only time will.  Hopefully I'll remember to update the blog when that happens so you all can know if my feelings changed or not :).